Friday, June 12, 2009

The case for a bidet

We need a bidet in this building.

My suggestion? Let’s remove the toilet from the Peter Brady stall on four and put a bidet in there.

There are already 20 men’s room stalls in the building. And aside from the infamous “Homemade Chili Day” in 2005, there has never been a time when all 20 have been in use at the same time.

Can we not spare one stall for a premium potty experience? A small luxury to promote derriere health?

And four is the perfect floor for it--the guys whose names are on the building sit on that floor and the men’s room has high-quality, executive washroom feel to it. But it’s accessible to schmos like you and me.

Will a bidet solve all our problems? Of course not. As has been documented on this blog many, many, many times, there are some profoundly broken people in this building. A bidet will not help them. Taking a power sprayer to their undercarriage probably wouldn’t help them.

A bidet is for the rest of us. The common man. The every day dumper who just wants to get clean down there. To feel fresh.

Let us unite in this cause, men. We deserve it.

1 comment:

  1. I grew up in Europe and the first thing I've noticed when I moved here in the US is the lack of bidet. I went out immediately to get one. I can't believe Americans doesn't use bidets!